Santa and Margaret Guidry Tanner

   Christmas has come and gone, once again. When I was a child, I remember telling my grandmother Guidry, that the summer was over too quickly and that the time had flown by. She told me that the older you get, the faster it flies. I have found that to be true. Speaking of truth, I know the reason for the season. I do. But I can't help the way that I feel, every time I see a Santa Claus or Christmas lights. As children we knew when it was time for Christmas. The first signs were lighted bells coming out of our neighbor, Mr. Kerr's, chimney. We believed in the jolly old man that waved from his front porch and it made the time magical. Mr. Kerr decorated every tree and bush with lights and figures. We made our lists and were motivated to behave, most of the time. But that was during the Christmas season. What we lived every day, was the "true meaning" of Christmas. That thing that people want to remind you of, "what Christmas is really all about". What they don't realize, is that, no one really needs to say it. I hear people say " It's not about presents". Really? I didn't know! Seriously? We get it. But to me, it IS about the giving, not the getting. I love to buy and give gifts. Isn't that a Christian value? LOL! I have one surviving thing from my childhood Christmases, a little Santa Claus bank that my mother gave us. She was the most giving and selfless person I knew. She taught us the true meaning of Christmas, throughout the year. So many times my parents sacrificed for us to have the important things in life. They taught us to give out of our lack. To me that is the magic of Christmas.
   My mother passed away at thirty nine years old, after a two and a half year battle with cancer. But when she was healthy, she was the most fun mother in town. Everyone said that they loved to come to our house. It wasn't the neatest home, we were five kids and two parents, but it was a home where she let us be kids. Our home was clean enough to be healthy and dirty enough to be happy! My mother was relaxed that way, but not in her expectations for our character building. We went to a Catholic school, which was a sacrifice that they made for us, a "gift". We went to church every Sunday and confession every Saturday. During Lent, we attended the Stations of the Cross and at least once a week we attended mass in addition to Sunday mass. Every Sunday we had church and then lunch with my father's family. His mother, Mama Tanner, cooked a huge lunch and afterwards we watched football and then the adults later played cards or dominoes. That's not to forget prayers at St. Michael's morning assembly, meals and bedtime. On Sundays after church, we spent the day with all of our cousins too!  We played outside and used our imaginations. We colored in color books, played chase or "123 red light!" and "Mother may I?" We had traditions and continuity in our lives, which made for a stable and secure home life. Life seemed simple then.

   My birthday is on December 12th. One year, she took me with her to do the grocery shopping, just the two of us. It was the Saturday before my big day. At the store, she bought me a container of candy in the shape of a peppermint stick and another Santa something for my birthday gift. I remember how special she made me feel. It had always been her mission to make each of us feel special and loved in our own way. One summer she took all five of us to the store and let us each pick out one toy. It was a memorable time because it didn't happen every day or year for that matter. I already had in my mind, that I wanted a SLINKY. They didn't have one at the store where everyone else had found their surprise gift. My mother, being the kindest soul, told me that she would stop by another place and let me look for one. She did and I found one! I will never forget the feeling of appreciation for her effort, just for me. I am sure my siblings could recount the ways that she did that for them too. She did have a way of making us all feel special.
   On December 30, 2010, she would have been 73 years old. I wonder what kind of "old lady" she would have been. Would she be old or would she still be young at heart? I think the latter. She would have approached aging like she did cancer, with a huge fight. Going out with style and dignity. I only have my memories of long ago, to emulate her with. In her short life she packed a punch. She left us with strength and courage. We all miss her. Her life was too short, but I am sure she was waiting with open arms for all of my loved ones who have joined her. Maybe she needed to be there for them! Who knows?! We all try to guess the meaning and the reasons. We try to figure it out. The meaning of events, tragedies, life, Christmas. For me, it's about the giving and FORgiving. It's the reason for the season. The season of "My Beautiful Life".